By no means do I remember “Enjoy the Silence” as a best or favorite song, just one that really stuck without really knowing why.
The first time I remember hearing “Enjoy the Silence” by Depeche Mode was around eleven or twelve years old. I was staying with my friend Günther at his apartment in Bottmingen, Switzerland for part of the summer. Günther—in his thirties at the time because he is 20 years older than me—is a big fan of electronic music and has his CD collection on shelves in every room of his apartment (except the bathroom, but including the kitchen!).
I have always been curious—sometimes too curious—but have since learned that information that is meant to come will come! “Enjoy the Silence” standing out so clearly in my memory for no apparent reason is far from a personal anomaly; this goes for seemingly insignificant or passing statements made by all sorts of people in my life. Some of these individuals have come and gone, others come and stayed, and others have been there all along. And this goes well beyond statements and songs for me!
One symptom made apparent by my brush with death while battling Chronic Lyme Disease was tinnitus. (Apparently that constant high pitch tone I was hearing was not supposed to be there!) I’ve been Lyme-free since about the beginning of December 2016, but the tinnitus I had been experiencing for as long as I can remember remained until it started getting quieter the following January.
Then it hit me. Just a few days ago, I happened to be home alone and had just finished eating dinner when all of a sudden I was overcome with inexplicable tears of joy. If you have never experienced tears of joy without consciously knowing why, let me tell you two things from my experiences:
- It is a very strange sensation (although you get used to it after the first few times)
- Feeling such a sensation without a conscious reason amplifies the joy (which made me wonder if this is similar to what it’s like to be on certain drugs).
There is no doubt at all in my mind that the information age is great and the internet has absolutely contributed a lot to my life and all of humanity—both positively and negatively. However, there are some things Google just cannot help you with.
Okay, yes… To some it may seem obvious that the presence of tinnitus made it
impossible for me to experience literal silence. And for my particular experience, there was clearly a literal aspect.
But after the water works were over and “Enjoy the Silence” had been on loop in my head three or four times, I disengaged the repeat function and noticed the complete lack of tinnitus… Not one single remnant of a high pitch tone!
The way the human mind often works with subtle symbolism and metaphors never ceases to amaze me, and had I not embraced the inexplicable water works, I still may not have realized the tinnitus was gone and that I can now enjoy the silence.